Wednesday, October 9, 2013

23rd & 24th Anniversary

So here we are 23 years into marriage and 24 years dating. Together Dennis Marks Jr. and I have 6 children Buke (Dennis Marks III), Samantha Marks, Bryan Graham, Dennise Alana Marks, Deanna Marks, and Dorothy Marks. We thank God each day for everyone of them, and the time God has allotted us together. Over the years we have climbed over many mountains while overcoming many obstacles along the way.

Shortly after this year started I was diagnosed with Fibromylagia, and then Dennis had an accident at work which has kept him out of work. Dennis is used to being in charge and for the first time he had to depend on everyone around him. How quickly we learn just who cares. He is slowly healing, just not as fast as he would have hoped. Through it all God has moved in our lives and has provided for us the whole time.

We are blessed to have our grand daughter Lillyann who we love with all of our hearts as well as her sister Alaina Faith who is due in February. We also welcome in our Daughter-in-law to be Taylor Simmons who will be married to our son in the spring of 2014. Our dreams have come true through our children.

When we first thought about our lives together we envisioned 6 children, grand children, and even great grand children, filled with many years of laughter and love along the way. Of course we have had days of sorrow, loss, anger and even days when we were ready to throw in the towel, but the Taurus in both of us wouldn't let it happen.

Yes 24 years later and he still tries to lick my face.

People have asked us how we do it. First of all we have always taken time for date night. Over the years the kids have realized that these days are important not only for us but also for the family. We have had date nights were we didn't have any money to times where we could splurge and everyone of them is just as important as any other. We are able to take time for each other and also talk about things we would like to do or see happen in the future.

Second we try to keep things light. When most people would be worried about things, we laugh over them, or find something to laugh about during the situation. See Dennis is very Pessimistic while I on the other hand am very optimistic. Like I said we are both Taurus's so we tend to butt heads a lot but when all is said and done we usually end up somewhere in the middle, on common ground if you will.

About half way into our marriage my prayers to God finally worked out and Dennis my husband was saved. It took the passing of my father and many years in between of going to church on and off for God to work all things out, but it did happen. I do caution though to be careful for what you pray for, and try to talk to your spouse about what they might be praying for.

About 6 years ago I was praying for patience and Dennis happened to be too, we did not know until everything was over with, but we ended up being homeless. We moved from our trailer to a house so our kids would have more room and soon after I became ill and had to stop working my better paying job. Actually I only kept the other job because we needed the money to make rent, and the Dr. agreed as long as I had something to sit on he would allow me to work. Shortly after this we are told we had to vacate the house, that the landlords had not payed their mortgage, that they were not suppose to be renting the house out, and that they couldn't be found. We learned patience really well over the next 3 months. Being pregnant, working full time, and trying to care for 5 kids with no place to stay was not fun at all. Dennis slept on the cement landing outside of his job while I slept in the car with the kids. We did the best we could till we ended up where we are now. Patience is something we both now have.

The beginning of this year I started to pray for my husband and again unknown to me he was also praying for himself. Shortly after he had the accident at work which has like I said caused him to not be able to work. Even though we didn't want to go through either of the above things in our lives we have learned so much along the way. It doesn't make us perfect, but through it all we have gained more then lost, which has strengthened our marriage that much more.

Each day we learn about each other, and yes even 24 years later we are still learning about each other. We have cried together, laughed together, gotten angry together, and yes even made mistakes together, but the one thing we have always had is each other, and of course God's every lasting patience and guidance through it all. We have more yet to learn and are a little excited to see what the years ahead have to to offer.

Dennis is not only my husband he is my best friend, over the years we have confided the depths of our hearts to each other, and even when we haven't agreed with each other, we have always found that in the end it always strengthens our tie to each other. Marriage takes a lot of love, faith, hope, patience, compromising, and holding on when all others would love to see you fail.  I am very blessed with my husband and my children. I love them all.

In closing I will say what my parents said to me. "Choose right the first time"